One of the hardest things for me is knowing my narcissist moved on so easily without me. The truth is he began moving on from the moment he reconnected with me. From the first time he said, “I am falling in love with you again- you are my soul mate (again), my one and only, and you are perfection blah blah blah” he was already baiting the hook for my replacement. I cannot take this personally, as I must realize by now only a sick disordered personality would ever be able carry out such hurtful, manipulative, and cruel conduct. The reason he is on to someone else and I am not, is because I am NORMAL! Wel…l more normal than the narcissist to be sure. I was abandoned, and discarded while I was still investing, and working on the relationship. It is easy to think wow there must be something wrong with me. I can’t connect with anyone. The truth is I have not yet disconnected from the illusion of the ideal romance I thought I had. Most of us are not courting other relationships while telling the person we are with “you are the love of my life!” Only a very corrupt character could be so evil. Normal people feel bad when they mislead and lie, not my narcissist!
The reason narcissists moved on so easily, is because they do not subject themselves to the NORMAL rules of good conduct. They will NOT experience the grief of a broken heart. Their investment in us was ephemeral. We are grieving a hollowed out shell of artificial emotional mimicry. It is not our fault that we want to invest in others. But it is our humanity that made us vulnerable to him. It his lack of humanity that will continue to drive him. He will never, never, never change. We will! Think about “normal.” Normal people, good people, people of integrity, and character are not wired to lie, and cheat for their sadistic pleasure. This is who we mourn, the soulless sadist laughing, and delighting in our pain. List the attributes of what you think is NORMAL. Compare that list to all the other list you have made regarding the behavior of your narcissist… The gap, is real do not fall in it again!