Day 86 Brokenness, Commitment at the Narcissist Table!
People that come from broken place, tend to be broken. To embrace and understand one’s brokenness is good starting place to begin understanding one’s strength. The ability to stop recreating brokenness is a legacy worth pursuing. Just because a person comes from a broken system (and what I mean by broken system is a place where narcissism, alcoholism, abuse, and addiction run the show) that doesn’t mean that this cycle needs to continue, however sadly more often than not, it does. The problem inherent to brokenness is CONDITIONAL COMMITMENT. Conditional commitment is a way to ameliorate the potential risk of hurt. Conditional commitment says I will commit to positive change IF this, or I will commit to positive change UNTIL that. Full commitment says I commit to positive change regardless of this or that! Commitment to the commitment is equally as important as letting go of the attachment to the attachment. It is a full out, unyielding self-propelled movement. This movement has the potential to take a person from a place of darkness and into a place of light. It is leaving behind old ways and carving out new inroads. This is an arduous, yet rewarding process that takes time, patience and above all COMMITMENT to positive change. No one can do this for you! This is a solitary game. The good news is that once the commitment to commitment is in play, real and positive change can occur. Success breeds success. As true commitment replaces conditional commitment, better things are sure to follow. Narcissist are the quintessence of conditional commitment. They love us if…They love us until… Narcissist set their table with conditions, and ask us to sit and eat! If we are hungry for love direction, to some measure this may satisfy…at least for a while! But there is nothing nourishing about these kinds of relationships. I am not suggesting life outside the narcissistic fantasy relationship is all unicorns and gold at the end of rainbows. In fact, I am saying real life is challenging, bitter and sweet. It is the commitment to the commitment towards positive change that will sustain real narcissistic free change!
Day 86 Your Assignment
Think about your commitment to your commitment towards positive change. Do you follow through? Do you commit predicated on the “if this or if that platform”? Imagine yourself committed to real positive change. What are your goals? Set in motion at least one goal towards positive change and STICK to it!